Crime in Kansas City!!
I have been living here on and off for a few years now and have never had any trouble with the Police or Crime. When I arrived my friends advised me of the areas to avoid and I have taken there advise. Today however crime was upon me. Was it a bank robbery, murder or kidnap...... nope I had my number plates stolen. Not very exciting I know but annoying all the same. I arrived back at my car after work and noticed my from plate was missing. I thought it had fallen off. When I checked the back plate was gone too. When I looked more carefully I noticed the brackets and screws had been removed. I was actually glad they hadn't just ripped them off and taken the time to use a screw driver and do a professional job. Less damage to the car.
I wasn’t too happy at this point but I think I made a police officers day. Rather than dialing 911 I called the local police station and was transferred to the “Non-emergency Police Dept.”. The conversation went something like this:
Police Officer: “Good evening Sir how may I assist you?”
Me: “Hi, Someone has pinched my number plates and I was transferred to you to report it and get a crime number.”
PO: “Say what now sit? This is the Non-emergency Police number, can I assist you?”
Me: “I hope this is the correct number, someone has taken the number plates off my car.”
PO: “Hold on sir, do you mean your license plates are missing from your vehicle?”
Me: “Yes, that’s correct.”
PO: “OK, for a minute there I couldn’t understand what you were saying. Hey where are you from anyways?”
Me: “London.”
PO: “I thought I spotted an accent there. OK, what was the last time you knew the license plates were on the vehicle?”
Me: “At 8 this morning when I arrive at work.”
We then established the boring details, car make, model, time frame for the theft and that is when it got interesting.
Me: “I’m not sure if this will help you but I washed the car at the weekend and when I was inspecting it just now I noticed a hand print on the bonnet.”
PO: “Sorry sir, you have a hand print on your bonnet?”
Me: “Yes that correct”
Now at this point I have a feeling he put me on hold as he was having trouble controlling has laughter. Then he comes back,
PO: “OK sir, your saying there is a hand print on your bonnet?”
Me: “That’s right, I think the thief must have left it when he stole the number, err license plate from the front of the car”
It’s quite possible I was on speaker phone at this point entertaining the entire department.
PO: “Sorry sir, do you mean there are finger prints on the hood?”
Me: “Yes that’s correct. I thought you might want to send out a forensics team to lift the prints. It might help you catch the criminal.”
At this point I know I went on hold. Looking back it’s quite possible he fell off his chair laughing so hard. It turns out a bonnet is something a child or woman might wear on her head and there was no way the forensics team would be coming out to print my car. I think I have been watching far too much CSI and have lost a grip on reality. It seemed like a great idea to me at the time. I was even willing to wait in the car park for them to come out. It turns out the forensics team are busy dealing with murders, shootings and stabbings etc.
To be fair to the Police Officer he gathered his composure and came back on the phone quickly.
PO: “I’m sorry sir, the Kansas City Forensics Team will not be coming out to gather evidence.”
Me: “Oh (I’m genuinely disappointed). OK. What do I need to do next?”
He tells me the procedure and also tells me what to do should I be stopped by a police officer before I am able to get my replacement plates.
PO: “Sir, its been a pleasure talking to you this evening. You have a good evening now.”
Me: “Thanks for your help”.
Thinking back it really was a pleasure to him. I can picture him now recounting the phone call to his mates telling them about the crazy Brit that calling in the theft of his “Number Plates” with hand prints on his “Bonnet”.
After "calling it in" and getting my crime number I headed home with no number plates. I was actually kinda hoping to get stopped and have my first brush with the law over here but sadly I had an uneventful drive home. Perhaps I'll get caught on the way to work tomorrow. Oh the excitement of Kansas City :-)
I have been living here on and off for a few years now and have never had any trouble with the Police or Crime. When I arrived my friends advised me of the areas to avoid and I have taken there advise. Today however crime was upon me. Was it a bank robbery, murder or kidnap...... nope I had my number plates stolen. Not very exciting I know but annoying all the same. I arrived back at my car after work and noticed my from plate was missing. I thought it had fallen off. When I checked the back plate was gone too. When I looked more carefully I noticed the brackets and screws had been removed. I was actually glad they hadn't just ripped them off and taken the time to use a screw driver and do a professional job. Less damage to the car.
I wasn’t too happy at this point but I think I made a police officers day. Rather than dialing 911 I called the local police station and was transferred to the “Non-emergency Police Dept.”. The conversation went something like this:
Police Officer: “Good evening Sir how may I assist you?”
Me: “Hi, Someone has pinched my number plates and I was transferred to you to report it and get a crime number.”
PO: “Say what now sit? This is the Non-emergency Police number, can I assist you?”
Me: “I hope this is the correct number, someone has taken the number plates off my car.”
PO: “Hold on sir, do you mean your license plates are missing from your vehicle?”
Me: “Yes, that’s correct.”
PO: “OK, for a minute there I couldn’t understand what you were saying. Hey where are you from anyways?”
Me: “London.”
PO: “I thought I spotted an accent there. OK, what was the last time you knew the license plates were on the vehicle?”
Me: “At 8 this morning when I arrive at work.”
We then established the boring details, car make, model, time frame for the theft and that is when it got interesting.
Me: “I’m not sure if this will help you but I washed the car at the weekend and when I was inspecting it just now I noticed a hand print on the bonnet.”
PO: “Sorry sir, you have a hand print on your bonnet?”
Me: “Yes that correct”
Now at this point I have a feeling he put me on hold as he was having trouble controlling has laughter. Then he comes back,
PO: “OK sir, your saying there is a hand print on your bonnet?”
Me: “That’s right, I think the thief must have left it when he stole the number, err license plate from the front of the car”
It’s quite possible I was on speaker phone at this point entertaining the entire department.
PO: “Sorry sir, do you mean there are finger prints on the hood?”
Me: “Yes that’s correct. I thought you might want to send out a forensics team to lift the prints. It might help you catch the criminal.”
At this point I know I went on hold. Looking back it’s quite possible he fell off his chair laughing so hard. It turns out a bonnet is something a child or woman might wear on her head and there was no way the forensics team would be coming out to print my car. I think I have been watching far too much CSI and have lost a grip on reality. It seemed like a great idea to me at the time. I was even willing to wait in the car park for them to come out. It turns out the forensics team are busy dealing with murders, shootings and stabbings etc.
To be fair to the Police Officer he gathered his composure and came back on the phone quickly.
PO: “I’m sorry sir, the Kansas City Forensics Team will not be coming out to gather evidence.”
Me: “Oh (I’m genuinely disappointed). OK. What do I need to do next?”
He tells me the procedure and also tells me what to do should I be stopped by a police officer before I am able to get my replacement plates.
PO: “Sir, its been a pleasure talking to you this evening. You have a good evening now.”
Me: “Thanks for your help”.
Thinking back it really was a pleasure to him. I can picture him now recounting the phone call to his mates telling them about the crazy Brit that calling in the theft of his “Number Plates” with hand prints on his “Bonnet”.
After "calling it in" and getting my crime number I headed home with no number plates. I was actually kinda hoping to get stopped and have my first brush with the law over here but sadly I had an uneventful drive home. Perhaps I'll get caught on the way to work tomorrow. Oh the excitement of Kansas City :-)
posted by alongwayfromhome at 6:38 PM
0 comments
